Parent Training #2 - Homework

Yesterday, I tried to be an active listener when Joey got off of the school bus. He talked for a good 10-15 minutes non-stop. It was actually harder than I thought to stop doing my own things while I was listening. It was hard for me to sit still and look at him as he talked and rambled. But it seemed that when I did that he didn't talk as long as he USUALLY does. He seemed satisfied enough with the talk to go on happily about his business and play his games and watch tv. Normally, I am probably giving him the impression that I really want him to stop talking and am not really listening. So, he talks more and more trying to get my attention.

Maybe I'm not such a terrible mother after all! haha

We also baked cookies together last night (which was also part of special time that I was supposed to do with him LAST week) - oops! It went well though and I remained calm and let him have fun.

I praised Joey last night because he went ahead and started putting his pajamas on when it was time for bed and I did not have to tell him to do that. I was specific and when I told him thank you for doing that, he replied by saying, "I like to make you happy, momma". Now I feel like crap because I probably make it hard for him to make me happy some days. I need to be better and not so hard to please.


... I hope to have more things to write about as the week progresses...

Parent Training #2 - 3/18/08

At this session, we talked about how to communicate more positively with our ADHD children. We practiced the art of "Active Listening". I need to listen actively to Joey when he is trying to tell me about his day or something that happened. Usually I will get bored after a couple of minutes and start doing my own chores around the house while only half listening. And sometimes I will jump in and try to give a solution before he is done talking. I need to stop all of that, stop what I am doing and just listen. I feel like an idiot that I didn't even notice I was doing this. I hate it when people do that to me and I have been doing it to him!

We also learned about how to give our child corrective feedback while not being so negative or hurtful. We should also be specific when we give praise and always find something to praise them about. I think Jonathan and I have been pretty good at the praise part for Joey. I think we give him praise quite a bit even when we don't feel like it. I will still make an effort to be better at it and try to notice more things that he does right. I also need to make sure I am giving him at least 4 praises for every negative comment.

Our homework is to practice attentive listening, giving praise and corrective feedback.